Dear Bill Martin,
As a student and season ticket holder of the university, and a concerned citizen in general, I would just like to inform you of the present date. It is Monday, November 26, 2007. Yes... two thousand seven. I realize that Kirk Ferentz was a great candidate for a head coaching job three years ago. He had come off three straight seasons with ten or more wins, three straight finishes in the Top 25 of the polls and won two Big Ten championships. But. again... 2007...
I also understand that Kirk Ferentz is a nice guy and a moral person or something along those lines. But, if that were all that qualified a person to coach at Michigan, you should just offer Kermit the Frog the job and be done with it.
But again, and I hate to beat a dead horse here, it's 2007 and Iowa has sucked the past couple of seasons. Iowa is 19-18 in the past three seasons, and they just lost to Western Michigan (a team that is 3-4 in the MAC this year)...
Not to mention the fact that Ferentz has a career record of 3-6 against Iowa State... his instate rival. Iowa State! A perennial bottom feeder of the Big 12 whose only bowl win in the last five years was in the Independence Bowl against Miami of Ohio.
For the love of anything holy, just no... no Ferentz. If you're going to hire a Kirk, I'd rather it be James T. Kirk. At least he has some cajones and I'm sure Spock would be a capable offensive coordinator. I know that Mary Sue Coleman used to work at Iowa, and it's nice... no, not it's not nice. This is ridiculous. Is this the Harding administration?! The blatant cronyism is appalling. I'm so sick of Michigan hiring based upon ties to the school and friendships rather than merit. How about we hire the best coach available, Dr. Martin? Isn't that what you promised us?
So, let's go out and find the best person for the job. I'm not sure who that is, but perhaps we should try to offer some good coaches the job, or at least interview some before we hand the reigns to Kirk friggin' Ferentz after his wonderful 6-6 season? While we're at it, perhaps we can bring in an actual OC, or at least someone who doesn't have the job because he used to work here and is currently unemployed. Is it really a good idea to hire someone just because they know there way around Schembechler Hall?
I'm not saying Ferentz isn't a good coach and I'm not saying he hasn't had his successes, but this is ridiculous. How did you even have time to look at candidates or conduct interviews? The regular season isn't even over yet! Go get the best damn coach you can. Go find a better recruiter than Ferentz, a better strategist, a better motivator! I know that you can. Hell, I'm sure I could. And if, if you get turned down by all those people... then go give Ferentz a call. I won't be happy, but at least I know that it's the best we could do.
This is the University of Michigan, the winningest program in college football history! We have eleven national titles, the biggest stadium in the country and more tradition that any of us can even remember. We're the school of Yost, Crisler and Schembechler! For the love of everything that you hold holy, try to keep up.
Is it too much to ask that you interview some more candidates and pick the best one? This shouldn't be so damn difficult. Oh, and Go Blue.
Sincerely,
Matthew Bias
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